Teaching them to (dis)obey what Jesus commanded

A conversation overhead between a colleague and a well-educated member of the clergy. He was correcting my colleague's commitment to baptize new believers asap.

Why are you guys so hung up about baptizing converts immediately? It's not a pressing issue. Baptism is a spiritual thing, the physical expression is optional. Remember how Paul told the Corinthians that he thanked God he didn't baptize many of them (1 Corinthians 1:14)?

There you have it. Baptism is "spiritual" — the water is an optional extra. Jesus didn't command baptism in water, he suggested it. Paul wasn't fussed.

Well that make things easier. All those people tripping out to John the Baptist in the desert could have stayed home. Jesus could have stayed dry.

What a logistical nightmare for Peter at Pentecost when he commanded thousands to, repent and be baptized. Imagine how sore his back was at the end of that day. He should have baptized them spiritually.

So Jesus commanded his followers to, "Go and make disciples of all nations, baptising them (spiritually — water optional) in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit" (Matthew 28:19).

No more need for the bread and the wine. We can celebrate the Lord's Supper "spiritually."

What do they teach them at theological college these days?