New version of the Great Commission unearthed in England

In a development that is going to rock the world of Christian missions, a previously undiscovered version of the Great Commission has been uncovered in England.

According to this ancient manuscript, the Risen Lord gathers his disciples together and says,

Lads, don't go anywhere, don't do anything. What I want you to do is to devote a substantial amount of time over the next two years to considering a strategy for the evangelisation of the world and how you might lead the church in that task.

The authenticity of this version of the Great Commission has not yet been verified, but is already turning our understanding of Christian mission on its head.